6 weeks

Where has time gone.  As I type this up my little girl is just 40 minutes away from being 6 weeks old.  I can't believe she has been in my life for 6 weeks already.  I have forgotten what life was like before her.  She is so amazing and I feel so blessed to be her mommy.  I love her so much.  This is what I get to look at while typing this.

So peaceful sleeping there.  I am also blessed to have been given an additional 2 weeks of leave from work.  I was so sad, it was originally denied and then yesterday, the day before I was to return to work, I got a call from my boss saying that I could have the extra time off.  I'm so happy.  Its going to be so hard having to go back and dropping her off at daycare.  The only times I have been away from her she was either with her daddy or her nana.  Its going to be so hard leaving her with someone other than them.  I will also be away from her for 12 hours.  I can't imagine how hard that is going to be :(


I have been very blessed to have no problems producing enough milk for Peanut.  So much so that Nana had to make the turkey she had stored in the freezer because I had so much stored for her.  As of right now I don't know how many bags I have but tomorrow when I reorganize I will probably count.  The other day I took down 25 bags to add to the collection so by guess I would say I probably have close to 100 bags or so, ranging from 4-6 ounces.  This girl definitely has lots of milk to drink :)  

To wrap this up here are a few pictures to recap the last few weeks.

-Mama Lucas

1 month old

I cannot believe my sweet baby girl is 1 month old today.  Where has the time gone.  I only have 2 weeks left until I'm scheduled to go back to work.  I'm hoping and praying that I can get approved for an additional 2 weeks.  I really don't want to go back to work.  I wish I could just stay home with her all the time and not have to go back to work.  In the last 10 months I have been apart from her for 2 hours.  


Its great to see how much she has changed in the last month.  She is now more vocal and will try to get out of getting burped by crying.  :)  My impatient little girl wants her food and she wants it now.  I love her more and more every day and feel so blessed to have her in my life.  I have forgotten what life was like before she came.  I can't remember the last time I slept through the night and I don't care.  I am so used to getting 3 hours maximum of sleep a night and can function totally fine.  

This little girl is my world and I am so in love with her!


-Mama Lucas

Being a mom is hard

I so badly want to breastfeed Peanut.  Lately she has been biting down while trying to nurse her and tonight it was so hard to just get through the feeding and make sure she got all that she needed.  It hurt so bad.  I was given advice previously that if needed I could give a bottle once and give my nipples  short break that was ok.  After trying to nurse her and her trying to latch aggressively and biting down almost right away I decided to go for her first bottle.  Then came the trouble of her not wanting to eat from the bottle.  So Grandma stepped in to feed her.  I never realized it would be so hard to give her the first bottle.  I like nursing even when it hurts so bad.  Its the one thing that only I can do for her.  Anyone can change her, or sing to her, or hug her and kiss her and give her cute nicknames.  As long as I was only breastfeeding it was only me that could provide that for her.  I don't know if that thought process stems from carrying her for 9 months but I like being the only one that can provide her with something.  I almost wanted to cry when I started to give her the bottle.  Like I should have been able to deal with the pain of breastfeeding and continue to do it.


Its not like I wasn't going to have to introduce a bottle at some point.  I have to go back to work in a few weeks so sooner or later it was bound to happen.  I was so unaware of how much it was going to affect me.  


I originally wrote this post on March 5th and debated on whether I wanted to post it or not.  Written in the middle of the night after waking up for a feeding.  This post is raw feelings and my biggest moment thus far of mom guilt I've heard so much about.  Its a lot easier now feeding her the bottle, however I still prefer to breastfeed and have gotten back to doing that more often than the bottle. 

I'm so strong

From in the hospital my little girl was lifting her head on her own.  When she would lay on my chest she would lift her head to move to the other side or she would lift to look up.  I finally have taken the video camera out and captured how strong my little 2.5 week old is.  

Daddy went back to base 2 days ago.  Its been an adjustment period not having him here.  The one thing that will make these next 8 months go by a little easier is having Skype.  At least then he can see his baby girl and she can see and hear her daddy.  

I'm so thankful to have the help of my family while daddy is away.  Having them here to help with Peanut is so great.  I have no idea how single moms do it alone.  I'm sure I could do it alone but it is nice not having to try.  

-Mama Lucas

I'm 2 weeks old!

My beautiful little Peanut is now 2 weeks old.  I can't figure out where the time has gone.  Seems like just yesterday she made her appearance.  At the doctor's appointment last week she hadn't gained any weight since discharge from the hospital, which wasn't a concern since she was only 4 days old.  She was expected to be back to her birth weight of 7 pounds 6 ounces by 2 weeks.  That means she needed to gain about 6.5 ounces.  I was a little worried.  Nursing hasn't been the easiest and I was unsure how much milk she was getting during each feeding.  At the hospital they were saying to feed every 2-3 hours.  She doesn't start giving signs until 3-4 hours.  So that made me a little nervous as well.  


Happy to announces Peanut was 7 pounds 12.7 ounces at her 2 week appointment.  I guess she is getting all that is needed.  She is in the 30th percentile (for those of you that understand that), for her weight so I'm a happy, proud mama.  Now I know to just trust my little girl about when she is hungry and trust that she is getting enough each time.  

Look how big I am!

It's funny how used to a newborn you get.  When they are first born they seem so tiny and you get so worried about moving them and carrying them.  For me, that didn't last that long.  Now I cart her around on one arm and multi-task like crazy.  It's almost like she is an extension of me :)


She is the perfect little baby.  We are so blessed to have her as our first.  I'm so in love with her :) :) :) :) :) 


-Mama Lucas